5 Ways to Stop Living With Your Guard Up
From hurt in old relationships to broken friendships and destroyed families; I’ve seen and heard some outrageous reasons to “guard your heart”. But as i’ve written before:
“there’s a difference between guarding your heart and hardening your heart”
We can’t overlook the importance that comes with learning from your past mistakes; but there is wisdom in not letting those past mistakes paralyze your future. It’s a lot like taking scripture and throwing it out because you had some bad experiences in church. Sure, that church may have been representing God….but that church is not God. The same thing goes for your heart. You may have had some bad experiences with love, marriage or family…but that doesn’t mean those institutions in themselves are corrupt or broken. Someone has just failed to uphold them the way they are supposed to be. Take those institutions as an example and analyze some of the people around you. Here are some of the ways to stop from living with your guard up.
Don’t Let Your Past Mistakes Override What God Says About Your Future
Sometimes our past can be a haunting reminder of a person we are running from. It can cause us to do things just to spite our old selves. On the opposite side of the spectrum, some people use the past as a tool to learn from. They create a system where they play out every decision based on the things they’ve learned from their past. Even though I want to take into account the faults of my past, I can never leave out the one variable that can change the course of my future. The simple idea that God can change anything.
This doesn’t create a delusion but this gives clarity to a cynical mind that would otherwise be too wrapped up in predictability and soundness.
Being Numb To People Won’t Fix Anything
This is my downfall. My constant battle. How I put my guard up is I turn numb. I become indifferent. I don’t write people off, I don’t stop caring. I care just enough to not care. It’s a sad defense mechanism. And I know too many people that have it. But there are ways to overcome it. For one, realizing it doesn’t fix anything. Nothing gets solved. Or how about two, we become the actual victims. We end up putting ourselves in the actual fire, when in reality, if we could just fix whatever problem we had within ourselves with forgiveness we would have a much more open heart.
Deep Relationships Are A Commandment
God in Himself was a relationship. 3-in-1. He desired relationship from the very beginning with Adam. Jesus desires relationship with us today. There is no way around it. Relationships are a necessary part of life and when we “guard” ourselves from the entry level interactions of them simply based on the premise of “guarding our hearts” we miss out on the rewards that come with following Gods commandments.
It’s Not Just You and God
The mentality of God being the only person in my life I can trust is easy to fall back on. I can look up to the sky when times get rough and pray up to Him “Oh, Abba…It’s just me and You Lord.” But the truth is, He didn’t design us that way. He created us to be interdependent. Not to a detriment. And not creepily. But healthily interdependent. Where we can rely on our brothers and sisters when we need it most and be a true family, woven together to influence change in this world like no other people group. To claim that “it’s just me and God” is a self-focused statement. There is always someone willing to help. We may have just not found them yet.
Stop Assuming People Will Hurt You
Assuming someone is out to get you assumes a lack of trust in Gods plan for their lives. It all goes back to unbelief. If they can’t can’t be trusted to the point where you can’t deal with them, then you are robbing God of his ability to handle your life. I’m not telling anyone to throw yourself into the woodwork with shady people, but if a fear of people ultimately hurting you is a very real thing; then it’s not people you’re scared of….it’s God failing to protect you that you’re fearing.
Sometimes the enemy will sweep in and destroy some stuff, but if you look back at your life, and all of the negative stuff that has happened, can you name one negative thing that hasn’t had one positive thing come out of it? Probably not. That’s because God will take everything bad and spin it for His glory. So why be scared about people hurting you?
Did you enjoy this? Whats the difference between guarding your heart and having your guard up? Comment and let me know!