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I’m Not Cursed, Im Single!

In the ‘romance hall of fame’, behind the anniversary and honeymoon, Valentine’s Day is the top day that people appreciate and share the love and affection they have for their significant other. Stores and restaurants promote and capitalize on this day with sales, heart-shaped EVERYTHING, and chocolate. Lots of chocolate. People who are single love this! Well…

In this background, many of us who are single may experience the pressure of expectation, in regards to having a date for the occasion. Even Christians may deal with that pressure. Yet as Christians, we’re motivated to date with a purpose, and having an expectation to date ‘just because’ is something we just won’t do. I don’t mean that Christians are the only ones that choose not to date anybody, but it’s something that we do for specific reasons. 

We seek to be purpose driven, and in general, we don’t date merely because we’re attracted to someone. There’s intentionality in who we date because being wise with our time and our hearts is something God calls for (Psalms 9:12, Ephesians 5:15). Love is a choice, so we choose to “Stir It Up” wisely. With that said, there should be a basic understanding that being single isn’t less valuable or honorable than being married or in a relationship.

If one’s value increased or decreased based on our love lives, then my whole life would’ve been a cheap commodity. I’ve been single my entire life, yet I never had the idea that I HAD to be in a relationship, or go on a Valentine’s Day date. Even as a child, I never had a valentine, nor had I asked a girl to be one.

The freedom to choose whether or not to celebrate Valentine’s Day is there for you! If you choose to celebrate it, you can even choose how you celebrate it as well. There shouldn’t be pressure from anyone or even yourself to find a date or do anything on that day.

Being single as a Christian isn’t a curse, you’re able to enjoy every season in your life and this is no different. If you like to take the opportunity to celebrate your singleness, then you should do that. If you treat this day as a regular day, GO and do so, you’re not obligated to find something to do just because everyone is doing it.

Finally, there’s one more thing I’d love to address. I mentioned that stores and restaurants capitalize on this day. Heavy commercialization of the holidays always takes place and Valentine’s Day is no different. So there are some of those who in addition to not celebrating it, adamantly disagree with those who do. I believe this isn’t a good way to go.

What should be done is to encourage others to not cheapen love to a day and just spend money on someone while on a date. We can help people recognize that it’s a day for romance, and they should let it be a special day to show the love they always show, but in a special way.

Find ways to draw attention to what love truly looks like (1 Corinthians 13) so that people in the culture can see God work through you to reach them. More good comes from showing them what love looks like, than just saying how much you don’t like what you see. Whatever you choose to do, love what you do, and love those around you.

I love the sound of that!

Lamar Gibbs is a Christ Follower and Blogger at Thoughts of Redemption read more from him here!

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4 thoughts on “I’m Not Cursed, Im Single!”

  1. Single But Not By Choice says:

    Well for many of us good men that are still single which we can certainly blame the kind of women nowadays for that one. Women today are certainly nothing at all like the old days, that is for sure. Today these women Can’t even Accept us men for who we really are anymore. And now with most single women that like to party and get real wasted, well that tells the whole story right there unfortunately since they will never be able to Commit to only one man anyway. And it does really take two to tango like they say.

  2. Paul says:

    Singleness is a real Curse for a Good Man like me that really wanted to get married and have a family just like Millions of other men and women that have the Gift Of Life.

    1. angel says:

      Hey Paul, I totally feel you there. All we can do is continue to better ourselves as men and instead of finding “the one”…worry about becoming “the one” this way when the woman you fall in love with walks into your life, you’re prepared emotionally, mentally, spiritually and financially to give her the life she deserves. I promise you that she will thank you for it 😀 Read the love section of i truly believe it will be a blessing to you.
      Thanks so much for reading!

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